We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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