hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
