i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Randomize
