and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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