Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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