If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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