I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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