Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
im six kinds of drunk right now
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I've got a whole match.com system. Triple book. First dates always get the 6pm happy hour drinks slot. 8pm dinner goes to a girl where I think I can close the deal. 10pm slot goes to the sure thing in case of emergency, but 6 can always trump 8 and 8 always trumps 10. Just blame it on a dead iPhone battery.
That, my friend, is how I bang 50 new girls a year. Not luck at all. It's science and statistics.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
