he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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