it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I have so many feelings about this burrito
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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