i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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