therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
she smelled like a LAN party
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
