...so i touched it.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Randomize
