did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
