It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
is wine microwaveable?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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