So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
