the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Randomize
