Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
