I only kidnapped one of them. chill
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
