Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
we're making bets on your personal life
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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