i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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