Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Randomize
