did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Say something about gay babies.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
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