You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
