when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Bring me that man meat
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
