I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
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