Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize