He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
