suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
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