She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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