After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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