I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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