My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
