You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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