i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Randomize
