So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize