Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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