Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Dicks are not precious.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
