Having a random hookup so left but love u
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
