why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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