i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
there's paper in my vomit.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
