She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
You did what with his pubic hair?
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