she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
