Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
