I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
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