either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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