as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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