Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Randomize
