that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
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