after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
