apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
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